connecting with your husband


Second only to God, this is any wife’s most important relationship. For coaches' wives, there are definitely some unique challenges and stressors on the marriage, and it’s hard to stay connected as a couple. Many wives say that they struggle with loneliness and bitterness, and that they battle resentment on a daily basis. Divorce rates are high for coaching couples, but so is the opportunity to have a dynamic relationship that will be a testimony of God’s love within the sports culture. For this reason, we've asked Carolyn Allen to share her heart on marriage.


carolyn Allen

National author and speaker, Carolyn Allen speaks across the country, helping coaches' wives feel understood and sharing with general audiences leadership lessons learned as The Coach's Wife. Married for over thirty years to Randy Allen, Head Football Coach at Highland Park High School in Dallas, Texas, Carolyn understands what it's like to stand "next" to her husband as they both lead students and communities into victories both on and off the field.

The Importance of Marriage...

I’ve always said a Championship Marriage can be defined as a husband and
wife who support each other’s dreams. In the last ten years, I’ve witnessed
more coaching marriages that communicate this to the world. You and your
husband each have callings, and make sacrifices to serve each other. It takes
good communication skills and surrender- to the Lord and your spouse.”

Carolyn Allen, author of “The Coach’s Wife”


God says to us: “My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in the weakness.” Therefore, I am not afraid to say that I am exhausted! I confess that this coaching life is just TOO MUCH to handle on my own. But by His power and for His glory, I am content with the weariness I feel when my husband is working 20 hours a day and I am trying to hold down the home fort. I am content with the insults from parents and fans, and even when my husband is criticized in the newspaper, judged by the scoreboard and measured by wins and losses. I am content with his paycheck, his long hours and lack of job security. And I am content to pack our bags when he is called to coach in another school, in another state, because this means that we have a new assignment on the mission field of sports. And no matter how overwhelmed and stressed I might be, in the midst of it all, the Lord is there, meeting my weaknesses with His strength.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10, CWM “translation”

-Candace Lane